After more than three decades of marriage, Barack Obama is getting honest about the challenges that come with a long-term relationship, especially when the White House is involved.
During a talk at Hamilton College on April 3, the former president admitted that after his eight years in office, he found himself in what he described as a “deep deficit” in his marriage to Michelle Obama. “I’ve been trying to dig myself out of that hole by doing occasionally fun things,”
Obama told college president Steven Tepper, reflecting on how the intense demands of his presidency had taken a toll on his relationship.
Balancing Marriage, Politics, And Family
Barack and Michelle Obama married in 1992 and raised two daughters, Malia and Sasha. Over the years, they’ve remained one of America’s most prominent couples, but they’ve never claimed to have a flawless relationship.
Michelle, in fact, has openly discussed the struggles of their marriage. In a candid 2022 interview with Revolt TV, she revealed that there were “10 years” where she “couldn’t stand” her husband. She said, “There are times I’m 70, he’s 30. There are times he’s 60, I’m 40,” acknowledging that marriage rarely feels evenly balanced. She noted that much of the strain came while Barack pursued his political career, and she focused on raising their young daughters.
The couple’s transparency about their ups and downs has fueled speculation recently, especially as Michelle skipped several high-profile events like Donald Trump’s inauguration and Jimmy Carter’s funeral. However, according to insiders quoted by Page Six, Michelle’s absences were less about relationship strain and more about a general lack of interest in Washington politics.
Obama spoke at Hamilton and poked fun at himself, admitting he often loses arguments at home. He said his wife and daughters regularly mock him at the dinner table. Michelle, meanwhile, has playfully called him out for his lack of punctuality, joking, “You must adjust,” while praising his slow but steady progress over 30 years.
Still, both have consistently emphasized the importance of knowing and genuinely liking your partner, even through the rough patches. As Michelle once said, “Feelings are going to change over time,” but commitment and mutual respect keep the foundation strong.
