Former Victoria’s Secret model Emily DiDonato broke down in tears as she revealed that she had suffered from a heartbreaking miscarriage after becoming pregnant with her third child.
The catwalk queen, 33, shared the devastating news on TikTok over the weekend, explaining that it happened ‘a few weeks ago,’ but she now felt ‘ready to share.’
Emily, who shares daughter Teddy, two, and son Oliver, one, with her husband, Kyle Peterson, cried as she recalled how she went in for her first scan two months after finding out that she was expecting again.
She said she felt so ‘cocky and confident’ after two ‘normal and healthy pregnancies,’ and explained that she wasn’t even listening to the doctor as she did the ultrasound because she was so focused on seeing her baby for the first time on the screen.
But her entire world was shattered after her OBGYN told her that she ‘did not find a heartbeat.’
‘I went to the first scan for my third baby. I was about eight weeks pregnant,’ a tearful Emily said in the video. ‘My OB told me they did not find a heartbeat.
‘First of all I felt so cocky and confident going into this appointment because I had two normal, healthy pregnancies prior to this.
‘My doctor was doing the scan, I wasn’t even listening to her, I was literally just laying there looking at the scan and she said something and I was like, “What did you say?”
‘And she was like, “I’m not seeing what I want to see here.” And I was like, “Well I’m pregnant right?”
‘And she was like, “Well there definitely was a pregnancy but it stopped growing.”‘
Emily said she ‘immediately’ started to ‘blame herself,’ adding, ‘Everyone can say it’s not your fault but your brain immediately goes to, “When did that happen? And why?”‘
She also admitted that she was now unsure if she wanted to try again, despite always ‘dreaming’ of having three kids.
‘Because I’ve gone through this process now I’m kind of like, “Will I ever want to get pregnant again?” I feel terrified to want to try again,’ she confessed.
‘What if this happens again? Is this the new norm for me? I’ve always wanted a third baby.
‘I feel greedy even saying that, it’s just always been my dream to have three kids. But a part of me is like, “Maybe this is the universe saying, two is good for you.”‘
Emily also revealed that she was going to get a dilation and curettage (D&C), which is a surgical procedure that involves doctors removing the uterine lining after a miscarriage.
‘I’m in my office trying to distract myself because I am so deeply and profoundly sad,’ the star said between sobs.
‘Something that freaks me out about the whole thing is knowing that life started here and it also ended here, and I’m still carrying that life.
‘When you find out you’re pregnant, whether you like it or not, your entire body, mind, and spirit gets behind the fact that you’re pregnant.
‘You start planning, you start plotting, everything changes the second you find out you’re pregnant.
‘That’s the blessing and curse of becoming a mother, you just care so deeply. And then all of a sudden you’re just not anymore.’
Emily ended the video by telling her followers that she was not filming the video because she wanted people to ‘feel sorry for her.’
Instead, she said she was speaking out about it in the hopes of helping others who may be struggling ‘feel less alone.’
‘I’m not filming this to have people feel sorry for me, I have a wonderful life and I’m very blessed with two healthy children, but [I hope] this makes anyone feel less alone,’ she concluded.
‘This was a few weeks ago but I now feel ready to share. If you’ve experienced this type of loss as well, I’m so sorry,’ she wrote in the caption of the TikTok, which had been viewed more than 296,000 times at the time of writing.
Emily started modeling at age 10 after she was scouted at a mall, and by the time she was 17 she had become the face of Guess clothing.
Over the years, she posed for a slew of big brands like Ralph Lauren, Maybelline New York, Victoria’s Secret, Giorgio Armani, L’Oreal, Chanel, Givenchy, Louis Vuitton, Ralph Lauren, Calvin Klein, and Guess, among others.